My sister: You haven’t updated your blog since you’ve been in Toronto. How come?
Me: I don’t know. I don’t have anything to write about, I guess.
My sister: You could write about Amy’s wedding.
Me: About how Grandma was rocking out to AC/DC on the dance floor?
My sister: No, about how Grandma was busting a move the entire night! Or about how all the cousins were doing shots? Or about how crazy Uncle John is?
Me: Uncle John is crazy. I danced with him for, like, 30 seconds and he almost threw me off the dance floor. I was worried he’d re-break my arm. I ran away from him every time he came near me after that. The wedding was fun but I don’t know if it would be of interest to anyone who wasn’t there.
My sister: Yeah.
Me: I could write about the Tour de France.
My sister: No! You’ve already written too much about it. It’s boring.
Me: It’s not boring. It’s exciting. The crashes! The scandals! I could write about how the decision to kick Jan Ullrich out of this year’s Tour will go down as one of the biggest injustices in history if he’s innocent.
My sister: Don’t bother. No one cares. Write about the World Cup instead.
Me: The World Cup? I have no idea what’s going on. I tried watching one of the games but our idiot brother wouldn’t let me.
My sister: What? Why not?
Me: Well, the game was about to begin and the cameras were zooming in on the faces of the players and I started talking about how gorgeous some of those guys were. Daniel got mad and said I was only allowed to comment on the fouls or the goals and that if I was only going to talk about how hot the players were, I shouldn’t bother watching the game. So I left.
My sister: He’s no fun.
Me: I know. What’s the point of watching soccer if you can’t talk about how hot David Beckham is?
My sister: You could write about how you’re going to Japan next month. Or is that a secret?
Me: No, it’s not a secret. I’ve been meaning to write about it. I just haven’t gotten around to it yet. I’ve been so preoccupied with my broken arm and the trip to Toronto and the Tour de France that I’ve hardly had time to think about Japan.
My sister: Well, if you have nothing to write about you could always just post some pictures.
Me: Of what?
My sister: Of us at the wedding!