Monday, April 24, 2006

Vote for your favourite word!

Remember when I said (here and here) that one of my goals for 2006 is to invent a new word? And then the whole thing kind of died and you probably thought I abandoned the project because, really, who sticks to drunken promises made at a New Year’s Eve party anyway?

Well, I don’t give up that easily. I’ve spent the past three months compiling all of your suggestions and narrowing down the list. Technically, I guess that means one of you will invent a new word and I will get all the credit. But I’m okay with that.

Ultimately, the goal is to create a word or saying so pithy it becomes part of the pop culture lexicon. Like "off the hook" or "couch potato" or "CrackBerry."

The new word needs to be timely, clever and catchy. But it also has to be marketable. We’ll stand a better chance of going all Tipping Point on the word if we keep this in mind. So here are the nominations:

Aroungry: Somewhere between aroused and angry (submitted by Dead Robot).

Cereal monogamy: Eating only one brand of breakfast cereal for a long period of time before switching to a different brand (submitted by Craig).

Commutiny: The phenomenon of folks getting up in arms and overthrowing building proposals in their areas, ie. Yorkville condo towers, Vancouver Wal-Mart, etc. (submitted by Craig).

Fivebucks: Used to describe Starbucks because damn near everything in there costs a minimum of five bucks (submitted by Carrie).

Frey: Used to describe someone who exaggerates the truth (in honour of James Frey). Example of usage: "I totally padded my resume. I feel like such a Frey" (submitted by Sarah).

Horngry: This term signifies those lusty people who’d rather have sex, but will settle for food when they can’t get lucky, or will use food specifically to drown their unsatisfied lust (submitted by Delacey).

Hotrob: A person or animal that grossly overestimates his or her own physical attractiveness (in honour of hot guy Robert). This is not meant to be synonymous with narcissist, which is more like excessive self-love. It’s simply a term to describe someone who sees themselves in an overly optimistic light relative to how other people actually perceive them. Example of usage: "It’s hard to believe Craig thinks he’s in Laura’s league. What a hotrob." We may want to include a phonetic treatment as well, to ensure that no one mispronounces it "ho-trob" (submitted by Chach).

Googley moogley: The point one reaches when they get frustrated with Google and can’t find what they’re looking for. Inversely, the point when they find something 1,000 percent better than what they are looking for on Google (submitted by Dead Robot).

iPoseur: One who does not keep their iPod inside their bag, usually walking with it in their hands. Possibly thinking they’re one colour and in an Apple ad (submitted by Dead Robot).

MinoriTory: The current state of uncertainty in Canadian politics. It’s a combination of minority and purgatory, with the added bonus that purgatory ends in Tory (submitted by Craig).

Pimping the sibling: The attempt to offer a conjugal union of one’s own sibling to other interested parties or, simply, trying to set up your brother or sister. Example of usage: "In trying to set up her brother with other people, Sarah was pimping the sibling" (submitted by Eldon).

PS 2-2: Bizarre, interpretive dance-like movements while playing video games. Example of usage: "Billy was, like, all over the couch, PS 2-2ing while flying that X-Wing" (submitted by Dead Robot).

Reintarnation: The emergence of Canada on the world scene once again, due to the renewed economic viability of the Alberta tar sands in the current political oil climate (submitted by Tony).

Smallitics: Petty character assassination of those running for public office that almost always leads to that person getting elected, ie. Kim Campbell making fun of Jean Chretien’s facial tic, comparing Oliva Chow to a dog, and, oh yeah, this (submitted by Craig).

Wuzam: I was, still am and will continue to be what you heard about me. This is in direct response to the old "Has Been" question: When people ask about your past, ie. "I heard you were a model," the proper response is: "Yes I was and I still am (WUZAM)." There is only one exception to this word -- ex-high-school football stars (submitted by Hot Rob).

You can vote for your favourite word in the comments section below or you can email me. Once we have a winning word, my co-conspirator Chach and I will unleash it on the world by going on Speaker's Corner or something.

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