Sunday, November 07, 2004

Dodge ball...it's baaaack!

Adult dodge ball leagues are hot. I know this to be true because two separate articles in the Toronto Star and National Post told me so this week.

This is shocking and disturbing news. I thought dodge ball went the way of the death penalty, deemed to be cruel and unusual punishment.

But, no, it seems adults in Toronto are willingly subjecting themselves to being whipped by hard red balls. For fun.

I couldn't wrap my mind around this so decided to conduct an informal poll around the lunch table at work. Half of the people I talked to were deeply, emotionally scarred by dodge ball. The other half were blasé, some even claimed to have liked dodge ball as a kid.

I'm not sure which camp I fit into. As a kid, I sucked at team sports but did well in individual sports (such as running or swimming). Although gym was one of my favourite "subjects" in high school, dodge ball filled me with a sense of dread.

I figured my sister Hilary would have strong opinions about dodge ball, seeing as how she is a 17-year-old high school student in Toronto. So I gave her a call this afternoon.

Hilary informed me she stopped taking gym after Grade 10 because she wanted to concentrate on more important courses (her words, not mine). But she is one of those strange people who actually like dodge ball.

"It's good for some shits and giggles," she said.

Me: "Shits and giggles?"

Hilary: "Yeah. Shits and giggles."

Me: "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Hilary: "Um...you know. It's fun."

I don't know anything about shits and giggles. But I have my own theories about the dodge ball resurgence. Perhaps the adults who are now playing dodge ball are over-compensating for a childhood spent cowering in fear of the mighty red ball.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

oh sarah, how out of touch you are! here at UNH dodge ball is an official sport. yes, it's true! there are serious intramural competitions. one morning, i witnessed a team practicing. they were wearing legwarmers and headbands! it was awesome! it made me get through my very painful workout designed by you. nice quotes hilary! when do i get to be interviewed?

Sarah said...

Jane,

If you have an interesting idea for me to write about, I'd love to hear it. I'd be happy to interview you. How about the fact that you're using your undergrad classes to pick up 20-year-old boys? Aren't there teacher-student codes of conduct at UNH? Perhaps I could do an expose...

Sarah

Anonymous said...

Ah, yes...you know you've reached the height of fame when you appear on the Hollywood North Report. Maybe you could start a Vancouver dodge ball team and pick up some hot guys there.
Cheers,
Hil

Sarah said...

How come the only people who post to this site are my family members? Does anyone actually read this little blog? This is so depressing.

Sarah

Anonymous said...

Hey! I'm not a family member. Maybe we unrelated types just like to lurk in the shadows and watch the Marchildon family dynamic and sibling rivalry reignite with each edition of the HNR.

Either that or the rest of us are "cowering in fear of the mighty red ball" of witty observation that you wield, Sarah, all while we desperately try to avoid being hit by a scandal of untold, epic proportions that will be chronicled for eternity in the next edition of the HNR. -K

Sarah said...

Well, I guess six fans are better than none :)

Sarah

Anonymous said...

OK, I am not a Marchildon but I do have some strong feelings about dodgeball. I hated this game! I fall squarely in the "traumatized from dodgeball" camp. But if there are any adult Red Rover or Capture the Flag leagues, I'd be interested....

Sarah said...

Red Rover? Oh my God. That's worse than dodge ball!

Sarah

Anonymous said...

Sarah,

I hate to say it, but I was the kind of kid that would probably open a can of red ball whoop ass on you. Well, I probably would have taken out a few other kids first, and left you there out of mercy. Someone else would have hit you first. (Ask Paul about murderball-- that's what we called it-- at Glenrosa Elem.)

I bet the resurgence of dodgeball is related to elementary school bullies like me finding the need to reassert the power structures that have fallen through the cracks since the real world took over-- the world where nerds become millionaires, and the quieter studious types became lawyers and dentists who charge by the quarter-hour. All those who made it at dodgeball became plumbers, electri-- wait, they charge by the quarter-hour, too! I actually saw a van on the street the other day that said 'Minute Plumbers' ('My-NOOT', I first thought to myself-- what's so great about being really tiny plumbers, anyways?)-- so they are now charging by the minute! Guess they are back on top again, and have some dodgeball league to kick some butt in and relive the glory days as well. Power to them. I, for one, will watch from the sidelines.

-C

Sarah said...

My thoughts exactly. However, I think as an adult I could do some serious damage in a round of dodge ball. With little kids.

Sarah

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