Yesterday was a good day. A very, very good day. And it was all because of a liquor store employee.
I had popped into the liquor store to buy a bottle of wine after lunch. And that's when it happened. The guy behind the cash register uttered those four magical words every woman over the age of 25 longs to hear.
"Do you have ID?"
It was enough to put a spring in my step and melt my cold, little heart. I felt like I had won the lottery. I wanted to immortalize this day so I decided to write down our conversation, and I now share it with you.
Him: Do you have ID?
Me: You're asking me for ID? Seriously? You're seriously asking me for ID?
Him: Sorry. It's kind of a policy.
Me: No, no! I'm not upset. I'm flattered. You have totally made my day. I can't believe you're asking me for ID! No one ever asks me for ID. Every time I go to the liquor store I always secretly hope they'll ask me for ID. And they never do. And then I get depressed and I want to drink but that means I have to come back and buy more alcohol and go through the whole thing all over again. This is the best day ever!
Him: I'm glad.
Me: So you think that I look younger than 19?
Me: Well, you asked me for ID so you must think I look under 25?
Me: So what kind of people do you ask for ID? What's the age?
Him: If they look like they're under 30, I’m supposed to ask for their ID.
Me: So you think I look like I'm under 30? How old did you think I was?
Him: Well, I've seen your ID so I know how old you are.
Me: Well, before you asked for my ID, how old did you think I was?
Him: Younger than me?
Me: Will you marry me?
Me: Nothing. Thank you. Have a good day!